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The ABC Café  |  Public Forum: Dealing with Bone Cancer  |  The Good Stuff  |  Topic: An Essay I wrote for my college english class. « previous next »
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Author Topic: An Essay I wrote for my college english class.  (Read 5124 times)
Krista
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« on: October 12, 2007, 08:22:26 AM »

I thought i would share this. I never share my writing but its time for change...


                                                    Overcoming Cancer!     



“I’m so sorry to have to tell you this Krista, but you have Osteogenic Sarcoma it is a type of bone cancer.
   I wasn’t too surprised when the doctor had told me this. Just that same week I told had my friend I had a gut feeling I had cancer, not really knowing what cancer was at the young age of fifteen. I looked over at my mom and dad and noticed tears pouring down my mother’s freckly but beautiful face and dad just giving me, “It’s all going to be alright look.” So many thoughts went through my head at that moment but the only thing I could think of was “when is my hair going to fall out?”     The intense chemotherapy began only a few days after I had received news. Walking into the hospital was like walking into hell. I was so nervous I thought I was going to throw up, and I didn’t even get my chemo yet. We finally made that walk all the way up the pediatric floor, where all I could see were little babies with no hair and IV needles and poles attached to them but with the BIGGEST smiles on their faces. I couldn’t see why they were so happy at such a difficult time in their lives. Were they just too young to know what was going on? Were they really scared and hiding behind the smiles? I was honestly confused.     Then it was my turn to get hooked up to the IV needles and poles which would distribute the chemotherapy into my body. Getting the IV needle put into me was probably the most frightening thing for someone who had never broken a bone, had never been in the hospital, and who had been healthy her whole life. The needle was so big and so long my body became paralyzed with fear. I was thinking “There is no way in hell that they are putting that long and sharp needle into my chest”. A very pretty blonde hair nurse with piecing blue eyes came up to me with a big smile on her face, one of those fake smiles that a adult gives to a child when something bad has happen or something  was about to happen .
   “Krista, just sit back in the chair and take a deep breath in and close your eyes, and on the count of three the needle will be in. READY? 1.2.3” OUCH! I screamed so loud I think people in Guam heard me.           Finally the unwanted chemotherapy was in succession through my strong yet very weak body. I remember trying to distract myself by watching television on the old little box TV that hung over my bed. They didn’t have much variety so I watched whatever came in clear enough. This process went on for about three more days until I started getting very sick and my hair started to fall out. When that began to happen, I was so depressed that my sister Jennifer came home from work one day with a buzzer and I buzzed all my hair off. It was just around Halloween time and here was this pale and bald girl with an over size black all long sleeve shirt on. I honestly looked like Uncle Fester from The Addams Family. A quite amusing to make did me get my mind off of what was going on.
   As the long, dreadful days of chemotherapy and doctor poking and probing 
had gone on for 4 months, it was time for my life threatening and life changing twenty hour back surgery. The chemotherapy shrunk most the tumor that was growing my sacrum, but not enough. The surgeons had to go in there and take the cancerous bone out, although there will be some difficulties after the surgery and for the rest of my life.
   I was aware when I agreed to the surgery that I could possibly be in a wheel chair the rest of my life, or that I would just loose feeling my left leg and have to walk with the assistances of a crutch or a cane. I didn’t care I just wanted to be healthy again.
   It all began in late January very cold winter we were having that year. I wasn’t that scared to go into this surgery. I would come out alive with no more cancer and I would make it through this. Sure enough twenty hours of the first surgery ever done at Memorial Sloan Kettering Cancer Center, 11 days in the ICU, and 6 weeks in the hospital and about 2 of those 6 growling weeks learning how to re-walk. Learning how to re-walk was a big challenge because I couldn’t use the muscles in my left leg that I was used to, so there was a lot of falling, frustration, but also happiness at the same time. I wasn’t giving up during this hard time. I was fighting and not giving up. Just about four years CANCER FREE, I am walking with the assistances of one crutch and healthier then ever.
 
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Krista Smiley
Cathy
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« Reply #1 on: October 12, 2007, 09:49:21 AM »

Krista,

Thanks for sharing your story.  We're sorry you have to be here, but happy you found us and hopefully we can support you and share your joy in being cancer free.  You're one of our youngest members, and I hope you will continue to share your feelings and concerns with us whenever you want to.  You asked me "how do I meet people?"  Well, you just did.  I hope our members will rally 'round you and make you feel welcomed.  I'm so glad you wrote.  Hang in there.

Always,
Cathy
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Cathy, Osteosarcoma survivor - tumor at the pelvis
2/2004 - Limb Salvage Surgery/Hemipelvectomy, Chemo
NED
Mary
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« Reply #2 on: October 12, 2007, 10:05:11 AM »

Go Krista, sharing your story for everyone! :-) It's funny - in some ways I feel like an older sister to our youngest members, but in other ways I have so much to learn from you too. How is college going? Do you know what you want to study? What kinds of activities do you enjoy? If there are things you'd rather share with members only (the board where you posted this message can be seen by visitors too), just post a reply to your own Krista's Update message thread and tell us what's up.

I am on a college campus again this year after ten years - taking social work classes in grad school. I'm only going part-time, so I don't have a good feel for the program yet. But it's fun to be back in school.

Thanks for sharing!

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Mary, ABC Founder, Parosteal Osteosarcoma Survivor - Humerus Resection 12/03, no chemo
*I am not a doctor. Nothing in this message is medical advice. Please consult your physician.*
Rene
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« Reply #3 on: October 12, 2007, 02:45:24 PM »

Krista thank you so much for sharing this with us. Those of us still in treatment or just starting can gain a lot of strength from you. Congratulations on making through chemo and for 4 years of being cancer free and learning to walk again.  Wink Rene
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Rene, Ewing's sarcoma survivor - in the left heel 1/07
2/07 - 3/08 chemo
6/07 left below the knee amputation
So far all clear.
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The ABC Café  |  Public Forum: Dealing with Bone Cancer  |  The Good Stuff  |  Topic: An Essay I wrote for my college english class. « previous next »
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